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Ryan Lochte is well-known for being a sexy swimmer.

02/18/10

A few weeks ago, the long-awaited (drooled-over) Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition was delivered into anxious, desirous mailboxes across the country, spreading warm (sizzling) joy to winter-sick Sports Illustrated subscribers everywhere. Men across the nation (and some women) devoured the magazine's celebration of skin -- a yearly beauty binge tradition that's a win-win for advertisers, models, and, let's not forget, Sports Illustrated.

Swimmers, we're getting bamboozled.

The infamous Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition is one of the most popular magazine special editions released annually. And every time it comes out, I can't help but think our sport of swimming is somehow getting ripped-off, swindled on an idea that should have naturally come from within our ranks. Hello? Swimsuit Edition? Swimming? Swimsuit Edition?

Catch the similarities?

When Phelps retires in 2012 (?) and ad-wizards plot and sweat over the next Phelps 2.0 to market, I have a humble suggestion: market swimmers. All swimmers. Just how they are -- toned and fit and sexy and piping-hot. Release an annual swimsuit edition with our Olympic athletes. Not something cheesy. Not something blurred or unfocused. Go to Tahiti, hire some professional photographers, and get Stephanie Rice and Matt Grevers in some sunset-lit, sandy embrace. Then watch the magazine fly off the shelves. Watch teenagers eat up our sport like the latest Twilight novel. Watch Ryan Lochte and Natalie Coughlin not only become modeling superstars, but also become national faces in the fight against obesity.

"Swim, and become sexy."

How's that for a marketing campaign?

Swimming World Magazine, I remember, tried this out back in 2008. But the issue they released isn't exactly what I'm talking about. Though the magazine's efforts were worthy and, most importantly, for a good cause (most the photographers were amateurs from inner city schools) I think our sport deserves an issue with a little more -- oh how should I phrase this -- "oomph"?

Our sport should sell our strong points. Including our sexiness. Fitness. Health. Physical beauty. Swimmers are THE sexiest athletes in sports. Go ahead -- look around. Want to see a 300lb. offensive lineman in a swimsuit? Or a 95 lb. marathoner? How about sumo wrestlers? Didn't think so. Swimmers have the perfect body tones and physique out of any sport. Yet we let everyone else -- advertising companies and clothing companies and Sports Illustrated -- steal the show. Swimmers pour blood, sweat, and tears to achieve their level of fitness, and a Swimming Swimsuit Edition would celebrate that. Plain and simple: Swimming is hardest of any sport -- we have the best physical bodies. Why are we not celebrating this? Why can't USA Swimming or Speedo or Swimming World or SOMEONE put together a sexy, sizzling swimsuit edition?

I'm sure unctuous mothers everywhere will protest, "Selling sex?! In our sport?! I. Don't. Think. So."

But it's fair time swimming embrace what we do well rather than what we don't.  We'll probably never cram 100,000 people into a stadium or demand the kind of advertising dollars something like the Super Bowl does. Swimming won't have crazy professional leagues with March Madness and AP polls and ESPN talk shows and top 10 countdowns. But take a look around on that pool deck, and it's easy to see what we do have:

Really, really, really good-looking people.

My non-swimming friends know two names in swimming, Michael Phelps and Amanda Beard. Obviously, there's no need for every Jane Smith Swimmer to pose naked in Playboy to become popular. In a perfect world, sport popularity would correlate to work ethic and dedication, and swimming would be #1, and everyone in America would swim. But we could show the benefits of our sport -- swimming is beautiful, and so are its participants. Why don't we market THAT more?

In a country where nearly 30% of adults are obese, we need to embrace the positive effects that our sport can have on someone's lifestyle. Swimming is EXACTLY what our nation needs. Already, there are nutty diets like the All-Lemon Juice Cleanse or the Yogurt 'N' Sweat Workout. Magazine shelves are abundant with quick-fix magazines, diet magazines, beauty magazines, "get fit" magazines, yoga magazines, eating healthy magazines. But most these magazines tout quick-fixes that never work. Swimming works. Look around on a pool deck. No one is obese. Everyone is in shape. But we -- as a sport -- aren't taking advantage of our golden ticket.

In my opinion, swimmers are sexier than Sports Illustrated’s models. Let's show Americans just how sexy physical fitness can be.